Communication happens all the time, even when you don’t speak. Did you know that only 7% of communication is transmitted through words? What happened to the other 93%? 38% comes from our tonality, the voice, tempo and timbre of our voice and 56% is communicated through body language. So even if you’re saying, ‘I didn’t say a word!’ You could have said so much more with your actions.
Clear, open and ongoing communication is essential in any relationship. It is essential to any relationship. Let’s take a look at possible reasons why it might break up if you don’t communicate:
1. Resentment: Without clear communication, resentment towards your partner will begin to build. They can feel that from the way they interact with each other. Are you a short merger? Do you lose patience often?
If the resentment continues to fester, it will turn into anger and sooner or later make the relationship unbearable.
2. Lack of Confidence: The lack of an open and honest conversation undermines trust. Keeping important secrets from yourself will affect your connection, whether you’re consciously aware of it or not. Research has shown that many couples can tell if their partner has cheated on them even if they haven’t confessed.
The less trust you have in your partner, the more insecure and unhappy you will become in your relationship.
3. Reduced privacy: Not openly sharing and communicating about your innermost self will reduce your intimate connection. In the long run this will affect your intimacy and your sex life with your partner. Chances are high that one or the other partner will seek intimacy elsewhere.
4. Disconnect: All of these points lead to more and more disconnection. Another form of disconnection is when partners are obstructing. Obstructionists stop talking during conflict and give their partner the “silent treatment.” 85% of obstructionists are men, but this does not exclude women! The stone wall is the last step in sliding toward marital disaster and cements your partner’s disconnection if done over time.
If you want to save your relationship think about your communication and start talking. It does not mean that you will always speak nicely, kindly and calmly, but it is better to speak while arguing than not to speak at all.