It used to be that bullying meant having your lunch taken away or getting a nosebleed after school. Today, however, bullying has gone high-tech. “Cyberbullying” is when a child, tween, or teen is tormented, threatened, harassed, humiliated, shamed, or otherwise attacked by another child through the Internet, interactive and digital technologies, or mobile phones. With their identities hidden behind computer screens, cyberbullies can be harder to catch and sometimes even bolder than their predecessors on the playground. Unfortunately, children have even committed suicide after being cyberbullied. Criminal charges were recently filed against several teenagers in the highly publicized case of 15-year-old Phoebe Prince of South Hadley, Massachusetts. The young woman committed suicide in January after enduring incessant bullying, “cyber” and otherwise, from her classmates.
Researchers at the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA) report that approximately one in four young people have been involved in bullying in some way. Bullies are considered popular and their victims are at higher risk of committing suicide. Both the bully and the victim can suffer from depression, the leading cause of suicide. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), suicide is the third leading cause of death among youth ages 15-24. Teenage boys are more likely to commit suicide than girls. A CDC study also showed that 14.5 percent of US high school students reported seriously considering suicide in the year prior to the survey, and 6.9 percent said they had attempted suicide. one or more times in the same period. Tragically, many children who have been bullied end up taking their own lives.
The incidence of cyberbullying is expected to increase as more children use text messages and email as forms of communication. Sue Limber and Robin Kowalski, researchers and professors at Clemson University in South Carolina, recently completed a study of 3,767 sixth through eighth grade students. Some of their findings are as follows:
- The most common form of cyberbullying is instant messaging.
- Chat mail and emails closed behind
- Girls were twice as likely as boys to be victims
i-Safe has surveyed 1,500 students from grades 4 to 8. Their sobering statistics indicate:
- 42% of kids have been bullied while online. It has happened to 1 in 4 more than once.
- 35% of children have been threatened online. Nearly 1 in 5 have had to pass more than once.
- 21% of children have received cruel or threatening emails or other messages.
- 58% of children admit that someone has said mean or hurtful things to them online. More than 4 out of 10 say it has happened to them more than once.
- 53% of kids admit to saying something mean or hurtful to someone online. More than 1 in 3 have done it more than once.
- 58% have not told their parents or an adult about something bad or hurtful that happened to them online.
It is important for parents to recognize if their child is a bully and/or a victim. Brandy Williams, educator and consultant to Texas public schools lists the signs of both a cyberbully and the victim of cyberbullying.
Signs that your child is a cyber bully
- Using the computer at all hours of the night.
- Quickly switch screens and/or close windows when it happens.
- The child is unusually upset when he cannot use the computer.
- Avoid arguments about what they are doing online.
- Laughs excessively while using the computer.
- He gets irritated if you question them or interrupt their time on the computer.
Signs that your child is being cyberbullied
- Unexpectedly or suddenly interrupts the use of the computer.
- You seem nervous, nervous, anxious, or scared when an instant message appears.
- Disrupts interest in going to school, extracurricular activities, and/or outside activities in general
- You are visibly angry, frustrated, depressed, or grumpy after using the computer
- Becomes abnormally withdrawn and distant from family, friends, and favorite activities
- Lack of appetite with food in general and specific preferred foods
The following are Cyberbullying Tips for your children:
- Tell a trusted adult about the bullying and keep telling until you find someone to take action.
- Do not open or read messages from cyber bullies.
- Tell a teacher or administrator at your school if it is school related.
- Do not delete messages ~ may be necessary to take action.
- Protect yourself: Never agree to meet face-to-face with someone you meet online.
- If you are harassed through chat or instant messaging, the “harasser” can often be blocked.
- If they threaten to harm you, inform the local police.
It is important that adults become proactive in advocating for change against cyberbullying. Many times, no action is taken until the situation gets out of control. Children are often reluctant to trust parents for fear of retaliation, i.e., losing their “cyber privileges.” Cyberbullies deserve to be punished as a result of their actions. Steps can be taken to collect timestamps on chat sessions and IP addresses. Computer hard drives can be searched to locate hidden IP addresses and chat logs. It is possible to collect enough information to present to school and law enforcement personnel in order to press charges. Professional help should also be considered, due to the higher incidence of depression between the perpetrator and the victim. A psychologist can offer a safe haven for children to discuss their fears and concerns. Ultimately, this could lead to saving the life of both the cyberbully and the cybervictim.